The Clumsiest Boy in the World

clumsie.jpgOnce there was a boy who was so clumsy he could prick his finger with a boiled macaroni. He managed to swallow a glass of milk, and that means including the glass, and mother had to thump his back for three hours until it came out again. And of course the glass came out last. He was so clumsy his bicycle drove backwards, and when he put on his trousers he always ended up with both legs in one trouser leg. When he picked his nose his finger got stuck and the doctor had to be sent for, and he was the only boy in the whole world who had broken his earlobe playing football.

“Why do you have to be such a klutz?” his father used to grumble.

“Why can’t you be more careful?” his mother used to wail.

And his sister said: “Ah, Robbie is too stupid even to take a crap !”

And although this was a very bad thing to say, there was some truth in it.
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Story of a Good Teacher

lehrer_01.gifA long, long time ago, so long it isn’t really true anymore, there lived a king. And this king had a son who was extraordinarily, unspeakably, unconceivably – stupid! Do you want an example? His tutor – of course he had a tutor all for himself, and this tutor had to tutor the prince whenever he was awake, that means about six hours a day – anyway, his tutor had tought him with great effort and trouble that two plus two equals four.
“Oh, your Royal Highness has made wonderful progress in maths”, said the tutor. “So let us now consider the following little problem: How much equals one plus three?
“Don’t know!” said the prince.
“If Your Highness would please consider: One finger plus three fingers, how much will that be if we count them?”
“Don’t know!” said the prince.
“I implore Your Highness, please: just count the fingers: one plus three equals four!”
“Can’t be!” said the prince.
“And what makes Your Highness think that?”
“Because”, said the prince, “just now you said two plus two equals four!”
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